To say being discipled changed my life would be an understatement—being discipled saved my life and my faith. During one of my darkest moments when I doubted everything except that Jesus was real, someone stepped into my mess and dug me out (see “Getting in the Pit, 1 and 2” post). Since then, I’ve had a vision and a passion to disciple those behind me and to encourage others to do the same. There are way more young women wanting to be discipled than women who are discipling. Even if you yourself have never been discipled, don’t underestimate the power behind having a cup of coffee and a conversation with someone a few steps behind you in the journey; you can do this. Here are some five questions to consider before jumping into discipling a young person.

  1. Do you have a faith story to tell?

Sometimes it’s difficult to know where to start. The easiest place to start is with the story of your faith journey. How did you come to know Jesus? Why do you follow him? How has life changed since you followed him? Thinking through these questions and then sharing your thoughts with a young person is a great way to start a discipleship relationship. After you’ve shared, you can ask for her story too.

  1. Do you love people?

I know from just living in my own skin that people can be a bit messy, unpredictable, do their own thing—because that’s describes me! Besides God being with you in the discipleship process, there is very little that I can guarantee. BUT if you love people, then you already know they’re a bit messy. It’s the loving that matters. It’s the loving that will help you stay on track, even when it may feel challenging.

  1. Are you growing in your faith?

I’m not talking about taking Bible classes or going to the latest conference or listening to the top Christian podcasts every week—although these are all great things! If you’re growing in your faith, it means you’re becoming more like Jesus. It means you’re spending time with Jesus, praying, reading the Bible, worshiping to your Spodify playlist. It means you are allowing God to mold you. If your faith is different this week than it was last week, you’re growing—and you have something to share with your disciplee.

  1. Can you be consistent?

Consistency is key. You and your disciplee can set up any kind of meeting rhythm that works for you both. (I recommend meeting at least twice a month.) The important thing is to meet when you say you will meet. Canceling or rescheduling often will set back momentum and any relational equity you've built. Few things are worth that.

  1. Do you have a favorite coffeeshop?

A coffeeshop or a kitchen table works wonders when it comes to discipleship. Really, you just need a space, whether at home or somewhere else. Over a cup of your favorite hot or iced beverage, you can chat, share, pray, laugh, encourage, listen. It won’t just change your disciplee’s life—it’ll change your life too.

Movement Step: Pray and ask God to show you the when and the who of discipleship. Pray over your calendar and look for a time you can set aside to mentor. It may mean saying “yes” to fewer things, so you can say “yes” to one of the greatest things. Pray for God to bring to mind someone who could use a little extra love and encouragement as she grows in her faith. Then being willing to reach out to her—invite her to coffee, to lunch, to a walk, and see what happens.