Guest Post by Ann Choe
When I was younger, I dreamed of the future I would have - career, marriage, kids - and always imagined they’d come easily to me. I also had the belief that since I was following Jesus and a child of God, He’d help answer the desires of my heart in all these areas.
Life continued on as I ventured into my twenties and then my thirties, and things did not go the way I had once anticipated. While my career was moving, the other areas were not so. There was a lot of heartache in the area of relationships for about a decade before finally marrying in my mid-thirties. I assumed it would be smooth sailing from there, but then my husband and I found ourselves battling infertility. I felt discouraged and full of self-pity.
One day, I went before the Lord with many of my ponderings and questions. Why hasn’t life turned out the way I had expected? Why hasn’t the Lord answered my prayers the way I had hoped?
In the midst of the questioning, I heard God to me speak a profound reality that changed my perspective on the past season. “Ann, I know it’s been hard, but through all of this, you’re going to find ME. You could have it easier, but through this, you’ll get more of me.”
There had been struggles, but here God spoke His promise of something that I knew I wanted so much more than a smooth journey. I’ve always asked to love and know Him more, and in that moment, God was reminding me that He was actually answering a deeper cry of my heart than my current momentary woes.
Knowing this has helped me to reshape the way I see so many moments in the past where I felt hardship and disappointment. And as I thought back and reflected, I realized it was so true. Even though things were difficult, each of these difficulties grew in me a deeper intimacy and reliance on the Lord that I would not have developed if things had gone the way I had hoped.
What if life truly is about the journey, and not the destination? And what if God allows twists and turns not because He’s forgotten us, but because in the midst of the struggles, we get to live out and experience God being with us - something far more important than the end goals themselves?
If you’re in a season where things haven’t gone your way, I encourage you to take a moment to pause and take a look around you, and see if perhaps God is right there, inviting you into a deeper relationship and understanding of His heart for you.
Ann is an SF Bay Area native who now resides in the Los Angeles area with her husband Yong. She has the privilege of serving as the Training Schools Pastor at Epicentre Church in Pasadena. She has a desire to see the body of Christ be equipped and activated to bring the Kingdom. She’s an enneagram type 2w1, ESFP, and connects with God the most through being in nature!
Maria Vasquez
“What if life truly is about the journey, and not the destination? And what if God allows twists and turns not because He’s forgotten us, but because in the midst of the struggles, we get to live out and experience God being with us – something far more important than the end goals themselves?”
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The above is so profound. To desire Him and His Presence more than anything, is sometimes a hard concept to grasp because most of us explain God’s goodness through answered prayer, material blessings, etc…. Rarely do we ever say “if I don’t get my way or get a desired outcome, I’m still satisfied with God being God.” On the contrary, we question his involvement, his concern and even his purpose when when things don’t go as we hoped.
This is a great message and reminds me that God simply wants Me. He desires to fellowship with Me above anything else in this life.
Jenn Smith Chen
It is SO true to see God’s goodness through answered prayers! It can be challenging, but oh so more rewarding, when we see God’s goodness as God wanting us and being with us.